79. How to understand and maximize your value in the dating market

Listen on your favorite podcast platform:

Welcome back!

This is part 2 of a 4 part series, so if you missed last week, go back and listen to that first.

In this episode, I’m talking about how to understand your own value in the dating market.

This might be a bit tough, so if you’re feeling tender today, I want to send you a big hug and encourage you to come back to this episode later when you’re feeling better.

If you’re ready for some truth bombs, come along with me now and know that everything I say is with love and in service to you so that you can find a great guy already.

Here goes.

So many women do not understand their value in the dating world.

They think that men value the same things women do (they don’t)

They think they look good for their age (they do, but it doesn’t help as much as you think)

They think that dating should look like it did when they were younger (it definitely doesn’t)

It’s really hard to be objective about your value in the dating market, but I have a handy shortcut.

Generally speaking, you are capable of attracting the bottom 80% or so of the men who have reached out to you on a dating platform within the last 2-3 months.

So if you want a realistic idea of who is actually in your league, go to your inbox and have a look.

The “top” 10-20% of these men might date you (briefly), but they’re either trying to date everyone on the site or looking for someone younger/hotter than you. They’re perfectly happy to have some fun with you if you’re up for it, but don’t fool yourself that you can land these guys.

You probably don’t want to date the “bottom” 10-20%, so that leaves the middle 60% or so. You can even go for the high end of the middle if you’re getting enough men reaching out, but please understand that this is your pool, not everyone on the site.

If you don’t like this, there are 2 things you can do. I suggest you do both.

Increase your physical attractiveness

Learn to appreciate the men who are in your pool

This is not fair and you might not like it, but we understand that life is not fair.

You’re probably never going to be the CEO of Apple, even though you are creative, intelligent and a good person.

You probably do not insist on owning the best car/house/clothing available in the world.

You understand that you do not need all of these things to have a great life.

You also don’t need the “best catch” the “entire package” or whatever you are calling this mythical creature that you would like to date.

You need a good man who loves you and wants to be with you.

He, or someone a lot like him, has probably been in your inbox in the last 3 months, or would be if you would get on a dating app.

So your value on the dating market pretty much amounts to who you are attracting right now and has nothing to do with how it should be or what it was like when you were younger.

If you accept this and work within these limits, you can definitely find a wonderful guy out there.

Next week, I’ll tell you how to value the men who reach out to you

I have a great resource to help you create your very own custom man plan so that you can find a quality man ASAP.

Click here to download it or go to bit.ly/MANPLAN.