35.  Is your heart too hard for love?

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Having a thick skin is helpful for a lot of things in life and dating is no exception. 

Having a thick skin means that you don’t take things too personally. You understand that everyone is doing the best they can in life and is just trying to make it through the day and get the things they want. Most people do not go through life, planning ways to break your heart. 

They just don’t.

When you have a thick skin, you learn how to take care of yourself in the dating world and take responsibility for making sure your relationship goals happen instead of just hoping that men do what you want and then being disappointed when they don’t without any participation on your part.

You can afford to be vulnerable because you know you have your own back. You’re going to be OK no matter what any man does or doesn’t do. 

You love yourself and you’re going to make sure that you get what you want in life. You know that you are the only one who can do this for yourself.

Having a thick skin comes from a place of self-love and responsibility.

Please don’t confuse having a thick skin with being guarded, jaded, emotionally unavailable, and damaged.

These things come from a place of feeling hurt and defensive. 

You are trying to protect yourself from being hurt again, but the way in which you do it pretty much guarantees that you will not be successful. 

No one wants to date a hardened, bitter woman who is always trying to find something wrong with him and the world in general. It just isn’t fun and no man wants to pay for another man's wrongdoing.

You also can’t fall in love when your heart is hardened. Falling in love requires that you open your heart.

If your heart is hard and you’re hurting right now, I’m sending you so much love. I hardened my heart for many years in my own journey and I get it. In the end, it did not help me to create love. 

What finally did was healing my heart and taking responsibility for my own results and then learning how to date effectively. Then I was able to change my hard heart for a thick skin, open my heart and marry the man of my dreams. I can help you do the same.

If you’re ready to get out there and date, you’ll need an amazing profile. 

Click here to grab my free guide to help you write one.