33. How to keep your heart safe

Listen on your favorite podcast platform:

So many women are afraid to say that they want something serious, so they try to play it cool and act like they’re up for anything.

Or maybe you really are up for anything at this time in your life. You may just be looking to date around and see how things go.

Either way, how you word this in your dating profile and conversations with men is important, because men are pretty fixed in what they’re looking for when they’re out shopping for women.

Women think they’re not looking for anything serious but fall in love and change their minds all the time. Men generally don’t do this. And so much trouble can result when women expect men to act like them.

A man on a mission to find love acts very differently than a man who is just out having fun.

I generally recommend that you leave guys who are only out for casual relationships alone unless you are very clear that this is OK with you and you have a history of being able to handle this emotionally.

By the time you’re in your 40’s you’ll probably know if you can handle a casual relationship. So many women can’t and there’s nothing wrong with this. 

Women are wired differently from men and the majority of women become attached to the men they are intimate with, even if they don’t want to. 

A deal’s a deal though, and if you agree to a casual relationship, don’t expect to switch over  to a serious one just because your feelings have changed. 

Intimacy will not change a man’s feelings for you, and he will resent your switching the rules in the middle of the game.

Know yourself. Do casual relationships work for you? Do you really want one? 

If not, play it safe by dating men who are looking for a relationship and don’t say you’re looking for something casual. If you’re not sure you’re ready for something serious, but you’re open to it if you meet someone wonderful, you can just say that. Say you’re taking things slowly or just getting back into dating.

Relationship-minded men will treat you better and you’re much less likely to get your heart broken than if you date someone who’s looking for something casual.

If you’re ready to get out there and date, you’ll need an amazing profile. 

Click here to grab my free guide to help you write one.